Have you ever watched a tv show or read a book and found yourself getting emotionally attached to it or to the characters in it? It's like you become a part of their world, start taking adventures with them and feel the emotions they feel. If you know what I'm talking about, you should read this and know... you are not alone.
In every good show I've ever watched, or every good book I've ever read, there was always this one character that stood out from the rest. Whether it was in the way they thought, saw the world, what they fought for, or just who they were. Sometimes I saw bits and pieces of myself in them, while other times, they were my complete opposite, which is why I respected them even more. Eventually, I'd get so invested in these characters I'd start reading blogs about them, fanfiction, and watching videos of similar-minded people. It got to the point where some even thought it was getting unhealthy. But I always disagreed.
You see, I'm the type of person that feels everything very deeply, so it makes sense that the same thing happens when it comes to fiction as well. Sometimes it can be difficult because it feels like no one understands what you see, and nobody feels what you feel. Therefore, it might even feel lonely, since I'd start crying my eyes out when a fictional character died and people would just look at me funny and wonder how can I cry over someone who doesn't even exist.
Here's the catch though. Just because that character isn't a real-life person, things still might happen to them that could happen to any of us. Their mother might have died, or their pet dragon might have been killed... But that doesn't change the fact that someone you hold dear might have died too or will die one day. Or that instead of your pet dragon getting killed, maybe your dog did or someone else you loved. Meaning that at that precise moment, the pain that the fictional character felt was real.
While on the other hand, when you watch or read something long enough, the actual fictional characters start to feel real. You watch them cry, laugh, bleed... their entire journey. In a way, they become a part of who you are. At one moment, you might hate them, while in the next, you might relate to them. In this way, we identify ourselves with them. Because most of them are not perfect - they have positive traits but also negative ones that cause them to be in a constant battle with themselves. Which makes them human, and it makes them real.
In the past, I tried detaching myself from fiction by reading interviews with actors, watching bloopers, and in that way reminding myself that these characters don't actually exist. I did this because I wanted to be like most people who enjoy television without getting so invested. Without crying every single time, a good character dies. It felt easier and it felt normal. But eventually, I realized I didn't want that. I like getting involved with these stories so much it hurts. I like feeling things deeply and passionately. It makes me who I am. Because of it, I get to experience everything more profoundly, and, in a world where almost everyone and everything is superficial, I find that to be a privilege. I find it a privilege to be me – a person who knows that just because something doesn't exist, it doesn't make it any less real. Even if the only person it’s real for is you.
With Love, Nina
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